Wednesday mornings are tough enough without our most annoying client calling in with the usual simple problem to which he is over-reacting. We sigh and answer the phone — all while making the facial gestures of a person eating oysters for the first time in their life.
WHY does that client seem determined to drive you insane?
It’s your fault…
Every morning the manager from the operations department stops in to tell you how your team messed up his operations this weekend. She’s so abrasive. You answer in abrupt sentences and quite rudely push her out the door.
WHY does that coworker seem determined to drive you insane?
It’s your fault…
Every Tuesday morning the boss has a “mandatory” meeting to review your prior week. You hate the meeting, and your boss is an idiot (and you know the feeling is mutual).
WHY does the boss seem determined to drive you insane? YES!
It’s your fault…
People deal well with people they like, are like them, and like them back. That means that unless you work at it, 75% of people don’t like YOU!
Are you “reading” them and listening? Probably not. The four personalities, DISC, are always at work and you ignore them at your peril. The Dominants don’t like chit-chat and they can only win if someone loses. The Influencers need affirmation that you really like them and they require a “win-win” to get along. The Steady Relators reject you if you are not on the team; they’re linked to the details and they will throw themselves under the bus for you and you don’t appreciate them! The Compliants believe in the numbers and don’t like to lose. They need to win, and they don’t care if you win or lose (that’s your job) and they don’t like you trying to find out personal stuff. Sometimes any personality can be distressed.
Want to convert these difficult people to your side? Read them, listen to them, and rescue them. Check your ego – be emotionally detached. Match and mirror their body language and tonality. It is very hard – but worthwhile and very productive!
Check out this podcast to learn more about matching the communication styles of others!
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